I just finished reading two books that probably couldn't be more different if they'd tried.
First I'm finally getting around to reading all the Jane Austen books that I've seen as movies, most recently Pride and Prejudice. Set in a country neighborhood in regency England, it focuses on the romantic lives of the five Bennet daughters. Major crises involve a scandalous elopement, rejected proposals and misjudgements of characters. Everyone lives happily ever after.
Naturally I followed that up with Enders Game by Orson Scott Card. Set, largely, in outerspace in some unstated time in the future, it focuses on the highly traumatic childhood of one Ender Wiggen, potential savior of mankind. Major crises involve a sadistic older brother bent on ruling the world, interpersonal combat between Ender and other children, and interstellar battles - the outcome of which will determine the future of humanity. A good bit of death & destruction in the final couple chapters.
I have to say... I love both of these books. It's nice to get lost in Jane Austen's world of manners and small town dramas. While I'm glad I didn't actually have to live through that particular time period... it's a fun and romantic place to visit. And as for Ender... the psychological thrill ride is engaging even though this is my third or fourth time reading it.
On my own psychological thrill ride through Thailand, I'm feeling about as far from my life back in the States as I could possibly feel. I miss it, and I feel homesick. But I know that I don't really have a home there anymore. Wherever I go, whatever I do when I'm done here in Thailand... I'll have to start over from scratch. Yeah, I know people in Portland, and obviously I know the city and the language. But I'll need to find a job, a place to live and spend some time and energy rebuilding friendships. I've changed a lot. I'm not going to fit back into the same slot I was in when I left. It's unsettling. I know I shouldn't worry about things like that... cross that bridge when I come to it and all. I can't help it though... worrying about the future is one of those traits that doesn't seem to be changing much. ;)
So I have a question for those of you who have lived abroad... how did you know when it was time to come 'home'... and what were the biggest adjustments you had to make?
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8 comments:
OK, I can't speak to the living abroad thing, but I LOVE LOVE LOVE Ender's Game. And when you have access to them, read the rest of the series - the Shadow books (focusing on Bean) are incredible.
Don't worry too much about having changed, we're not all in stasis over here :-) I get the apprehension, but, to some degree, wasn't personal change/ growth the goal? If you came back exactly the same, how disappointed would you be? When you come back, I will be thrilled to get to know you all over again, and you'll have to do the same with me!
I read Ender's Game a long time ago and loved it. I don't know how I'd feel about it if I picked it up again now... Some books grow with us, and some books, we outgrow.
We all change. We all have different experiences. What you have learned in Thailand is that you are capable of going to a place that's completely different and building a life there, from scratch. You're well-equipped to handle the next step, wherever your journey takes you.
trillian - yeah, it's one of the most amazing books I've ever read. I heart Ender, and am proud to call myself a Third. =)
Melody - I know... I know, but you're not even going to be there when I get back =( .
Batty - I have learned a lot and hopefully it will all help me when I get home. I don't know, I wonder how much I'll shed as soon as I'm back to the American mindset. It'll be interesting.
"I've changed a lot. I'm not going to fit back into the same slot I was in when I left. It's unsettling."
It's exactly it (and oh please know you are not alone in those sentiments right now!) And by best wisdom is this: those that know you and love you will willingly alter the slot for you, whatever shape you need it to be...
it was time to come home when my work visa ran out. i wish i had been able to stay longer. and since i went immediately after college, the biggest adjustment i had to make was getting going on the "growing up" thing (finding a place, a job, etc). also a slight, perceived diminishing of freedom. i obviously was of adult age and not under anyone's authority, but i felt like i could "get away" with more stuff abroad than at home, in terms of whether or not people approved of my behaviors. oh yeah, and the fact that i came home right into the drama of mom-dad-billspeedie...
mlle b - that's very sweet. =) And it's true, with some friends it doesn't matter how long it's been since you've seen each other, you just fall right back together immediately.
Marissa - yeah, I know exactly what you mean about the freedom. I think it's because I never know what's going on or what the 'appropriate' thing to do is anyway - so I had to give up caring about what people think and am just doing my own thing.
After I'd lived abroad, I knew it was time to come home when the semester ended.
My biggest problem was getting used to how sprawly and far apart we make everything in the U.S. again.
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